Forging Godly Love in a Broken World

By Andy Falco Jimenez

“Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.” — Ecclesiastes 4:12

At SHIELD of VALOR, we equip men, fathers, and teen boys to live with Strength, Honor, Inspiration, Endurance, Leadership, Devotion, Assurance, Love, Obedience, and Redemption. Nowhere is this mission clearer than in how we approach love and relationships. As a former cop and a man who’s walked through the ashes of two failed marriages, I’ve learned the hard way: love without Christ is a flickering bulb, doomed to burn out. But with Jesus as the foundation, love becomes an unbreakable cord, as Ecclesiastes 4:12 promises. Today, I share lessons from my journey, grounded in God’s Word and the wisdom of Christian leaders like Jack Hibbs, Mark Driscoll, and Bob Kopeny, to help you forge godly relationships that glorify God.

The Crisis: A Worldly View of Love
Our culture is drowning in a distorted view of love. A 2025 Barna study reveals 70% of young men prioritize physical attraction over character in dating, while 80% of marriages involving cohabitation before vows end in divorce. Social media, like TikTok’s algorithm, normalizes lust over sacrifice, pushing explicit content to teens, per a 2025 Stanford report. I’ve been there—chasing fleeting passion in my pre-Christ years, believing love was a feeling, not a commitment. My first marriage crumbled under trials, leaving scars on my kids, Courtney and Kelly. The world’s mantra, echoed in the 1970s hit “Love the One You’re With,” glorifies self-centered pleasure, weaving what Pastor Jack Hibbs calls “Satan’s web” of divorce, poverty, and despair. SHIELD warriors reject this lie, building love that mirrors Christ’s sacrifice for His church (Ephesians 5:25).

The Cost of Ignoring God’s Design
Ignoring God’s design for relationships brings chaos. My two failed marriages, unrooted from Christ, left heartbreak and broken homes for my kids—Courtney, Kelly, Rae, Rhett, and Beau. A 2025 CDC report links parental divorce to a 50% higher risk of teen depression, showing sin’s ripple effect. Hebrews 13:4 warns, “Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure.” My early affairs and lustful pursuits, justified as harmless, fractured trust, proving Pastor Mark Driscoll’s words: “Sin promises freedom but delivers chains.” A 2025 Focus on the Family survey notes 60% of men struggle with porn addiction, eroding trust and dimming their witness. Bob Kopeny, my mentor at Resurrect Ministry, taught me, “Love without Christ is a house on sand” (Matthew 7:26). Only through repentance and a Christ-centered marriage with my wife, Hedieh, did I find freedom.

Escaping the World’s Lies
To build godly love, you must flee the world’s seductive lies. Culture says, “Follow your heart,” but Jeremiah 17:9 warns, “The heart is deceitful.” My early dating chased passion over principle, leading to failure. Pastor Jack Hibbs advises, “Don’t date for fun; date for faith.” Ask: Does your partner love Christ? Do they honor Scripture? Dr. Henry Cloud’s Boundaries urges setting limits with those pushing lust or selfishness. Pray for discernment (Philippians 1:9-10), join SHIELD workshops or church groups like Trail Life USA, and seek godly mentors, as I did at Resurrect Ministry. Flee temptation, like Joseph (Genesis 39:12), and pursue love defined by 1 Corinthians 13:4-7—patient, kind, enduring.

The SHIELD Response: Love Like Christ
SHIELD of VALOR trains men to love sacrificially, as Christ loves His church (Ephesians 5:25). My marriage to Hedieh thrives because we pray together, study Scripture, and serve at Resurrect Ministry, embodying Ecclesiastes 4:12’s three-strand cord. Pastor Mark Driscoll notes, “A godly spouse sharpens your faith, not your flesh.” SHIELD equips teens to date with purpose, men to lead with sacrifice, and fathers to model Christlike love through:

Strength and Endurance: Love resiliently, like Jesus on the cross (John 15:13). Teens pray for purity, men endure trials, and fathers model forgiveness (Philippians 4:13).

Honor and Leadership: Lead with integrity, like Joseph in Egypt (Genesis 41:38). Teens respect partners, men prioritize wives’ spiritual growth, and fathers teach chivalry (Proverbs 20:7).

Devotion and Obedience: Obey God’s design, like Joseph rejecting sin (Genesis 39:12). Teens avoid porn, men uphold vows, and fathers teach purity (Psalm 119:9).

Inspiration and Redemption: Inspire like Jesus, redeeming His bride (Ephesians 5:25). Teens pursue godly goals, men serve sacrificially, and fathers pray for kids’ marriages (1 Corinthians 13:7).
SHIELD’s workshops, Bible studies on Song of Solomon, and service projects like homeless outreach build discipline and faith. In 2025, a young man mentored in SOV-like principles, Ethan, broke a toxic relationship after studying 1 Corinthians 13, now leading a youth purity group. Globally, Nigerian Christian couples pray together despite persecution, inspiring SHIELD’s call to shared faith. Use tools like Covenant Eyes for accountability, pray Psalm 51 for purity, and fast monthly to discipline desires, as Bob Kopeny advises, “Purity is a battle won on your knees.”

Proclaiming Godly Love
SHIELD warriors proclaim love’s strength, as Hebrews 13:4 honors marriage. In 2024, I counseled Ryan, a SHIELD father who overcame infidelity through accountability and Ephesians 5, now mentoring couples. At a 2025 school board meeting, Hedieh and I prayed for families, sparking revival despite opposition. John 15:12 commands, “Love each other as I have loved you.” SHIELD’s “Love Blueprint” guides men to journal commitments, pray with partners, and serve together, forging unbreakable bonds.

A Call to Action
Men, love is a choice to honor Christ, not a feeling. My failures prove the world’s way fails, but my marriage to Hedieh, rooted in Jesus, burns bright. SHIELD of VALOR calls you to reject cultural lies, embrace biblical truth, and build a legacy of love that glorifies God.

Action Steps:
Men: Pray daily with your spouse or potential partner for a week, using Ephesians 5:25. Mentor a younger man on biblical dating, sharing your journey.

Youth: Journal one way to honor a friend or family member with Christlike love this week. Memorize 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 and discuss it with a leader or parent.
Join SHIELD of VALOR to forge godly relationships, rooted in Christ’s love, and let your faith shine as a beacon of hope.

“Love always perseveres.” — 1 Corinthians 13:7

Posted by Andy, SHIELD of VALOR Contributor
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